I was scrolling through Inc. the other day and came across an article by Kit Eaton titled “Your Gen Z Workers Are Oversharing in the Office. Here’s What to Do About It.” It stopped me in my tracks because it’s a conversation I’ve been having in my head – and, frankly, sometimes aloud – for years.
I’m not Gen Z. I’m older. Old enough that my first mobile phone was a brick, and old enough that the idea of pouring my soul out online would once have seemed insane. And yet… I’ve absolutely been guilty of oversharing at work.
I’ve been the person who blurted out details about my marriage problems during a team lunch. I’ve been the one who casually mentioned my therapy sessions in a client meeting. And I’ve sat there silently screaming inside when a coworker, usually younger, starts telling me about their panic attacks, their Tinder disasters, or the intimate details of their family trauma – in the middle of a conference room where the fluorescent lights hum like an interrogation lamp.
So, believe me, I get both sides.
Oversharing Is Highly Subjective
The Inc. article talks about how Gen Z are comfortable bringing their “whole selves” to work. I get it. There’s a beauty in authenticity, and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t admire how freely younger people talk about things like mental health, identity, and emotions.
But here’s the hard truth I’ve learned: oversharing is completely subjective.
What feels normal for one person might feel mortifying for someone else. A story you think is bonding might come across as TMI to your colleague. A confession you share in the spirit of vulnerability might shift how others see you – and not always in a good way.
I had a younger colleague once who, in her first month on the job, told me in graphic detail about her ex who stalked her and how she ended up getting a restraining order. I cared about her safety, of course, but I also barely knew her. I felt paralyzed because I didn’t know how to respond. Was I supposed to offer advice? Just listen? Alert HR? It felt way beyond my role as a colleague.
I left that conversation feeling worried for her – but also deeply uncomfortable.
Why Gen Z Feels Comfortable Sharing So Much
I don’t think Gen Z overshare because they’re naïve or attention-seeking. I think they do it because it’s the water they’ve been swimming in their whole lives.
They grew up online, where personal storytelling is social currency. Vulnerability goes viral. The line between public and private is blurred beyond recognition. Sharing mental health struggles or personal crises on TikTok isn’t just normal – it’s how many people find community and support.
Then the pandemic hit. Remote work and Zoom calls meant we literally saw into each other’s living rooms. Kids, pets, messy bedrooms – all of it on camera. The boundaries between professional and personal life cracked wide open.
So when younger employees arrive at a new job, it’s natural that they might assume the same rules apply. If they’ve been praised online for being real, why wouldn’t they be real at work?
But the Workplace Isn’t Instagram
Here’s where I want to be brutally honest, from someone who’s been there:
The workplace isn’t Instagram.
It’s not a private friend group chat. It’s not even a therapy group. It’s a professional environment full of people who, fair or not, will judge you. People who might be deciding your next promotion, or writing your reference, or even just sitting beside you every day.
And once you share something personal, you can’t unshare it.
- That story about your ongoing anxiety attacks? Your colleague might now see you as fragile, even if that’s unfair.
- That rant about how broke you are? Your manager might wonder if you’re under too much stress to handle responsibility.
- That confession about your relationship drama? It might become office gossip faster than you can imagine.
These reactions aren’t always fair. But they’re real. Work is still, fundamentally, a place where people measure each other’s reliability, professionalism, and composure. And personal disclosures can shift perceptions in ways you might never see coming.
I’ve learned this the hard way. Years ago, after talking about my therapy journey during a meeting, I noticed certain colleagues stopped including me in big projects. They assumed I was “going through stuff” and needed space. The truth? I was fine and wanted more responsibility. But the damage was done.
We Still Need Space for Authenticity
Despite all that, I’m not saying Gen Z – or any of us – should put on a fake mask at work.
Authenticity matters. A workplace where everyone is terrified to be human is soul-crushing. And it’s true, as the Inc. piece points out, that companies stand to gain loyalty and engagement when people feel they can bring their real selves to the job.
But I think we need to teach young professionals – and remind ourselves – that authenticity doesn’t mean total transparency. It’s about choosing what to share, when, and with whom.
Here are a few things I’ve learned:
| Check Yourself Before You Share | Why It Matters |
|---|---|
| Ask, “Why am I sharing this?” | Is it to connect… or just to vent? |
| Consider, “Would I mind if my boss heard this repeated?” | Workplace gossip happens. |
| Think, “Is this helping the conversation – or derailing it?” | Oversharing can hijack meetings. |
| Gauge the audience. | Not everyone is comfortable discussing personal issues. |
| Keep some boundaries. | You deserve privacy, too. |
It’s Okay to Save Some Stories for Friends or Therapy
Some things just aren’t meant for the office – even if they’re a huge part of your life. Your trauma. Your health scares. Your romantic ups and downs. They’re valid. They’re real. But sometimes they’re best shared with trusted friends, family, or professionals – not your whole team.
I’ve found that it’s okay to say, “Thanks for asking – I’m dealing with some personal stuff, but I’d rather not get into details.” That’s still authentic. It’s not fake. It’s just private.
Managers Need to Handle Oversharing With Care
One thing I loved about the Inc. article is how it points out that managers shouldn’t clamp down on oversharing with harsh rules. That’s 100% true. Telling people to “shut up and keep it professional” can backfire spectacularly.
Instead, managers need to set gentle boundaries and model healthy sharing. They should let people know that mental health is important – but that it’s also okay to keep some things private. They should be trained to navigate these conversations with empathy, not judgment.
And importantly, leaders should create environments where people feel safe to say, “I’m not okay,” without fear of punishment – but also know they don’t have to spill every detail.
Oversharing Isn’t Just a Gen Z Issue
Let me also say this: oversharing isn’t just a Gen Z problem. I’ve met plenty of older workers who think nothing of talking about their divorces, sexual escapades, or money woes in excruciating detail at the office.
But the reason Gen Z gets singled out is because their cultural default is openness. And because they’re newer to the workforce, they’re still figuring out how much to reveal and how much to hold back.
My Message to Gen Z (and to My Younger Self)
If I could go back and talk to my younger self – or to any Gen Z professional – it would be this:
- Being real doesn’t mean sharing everything. You can be authentic without being an open book.
- Think of work as a stage. Not everything belongs in your public performance. Some things belong backstage.
- Protect your privacy like it’s gold. Once it’s out there, you can’t take it back.
- Wait until you trust someone. Test the waters with smaller disclosures first.
- And if you do overshare… don’t beat yourself up. It happens. You’re human. Learn from it and move on.
The Bottom Line
Gen Z are not wrong for wanting to be open. Their vulnerability is, in many ways, a breath of fresh air. But as the Inc.article wisely points out, companies and leaders need to help younger workers navigate the fine line between authenticity and oversharing.
It’s a balance I’m still figuring out myself, even after years in the workplace.
So next time someone tells you about their Tinder date from hell over lunch, try not to cringe too hard. And if you’re the one oversharing… well, maybe pause, take a breath, and remember that some stories might be better saved for friends – or TikTok – than the office conference room.
We’re all learning. Together.
