What do you mean by POWER Formula? is it a book? could you elaborate more on this please….

How did you approach people to discuss your work issues? If you didn’t do so, coming at it from the angle of ‘potential solutions’ might work. People don’t like to talk about other people’s problems (unless it’s gossip) as much as they do solutions. Do you know what you would do to overcome these work issues? Have you shared them?

Also, one tactic I use is to get other people to suggest a date and time. This puts the onus on them to check if they’re available and can commit.

And we’re all human. We respond to emotion. Just wondering if you have shared your feelings about your current situation? It’s hard to understand your personality from your comment. So I will speak from my own experience. Sometimes, if we’re shy, or if can’t build rapport with other people very easily, we can come across as snobby, aloof or high-and-mighty… when it’s the last thing we are. One way to break down the stand-off that ensues is to share emotion – reveal your personality so others can see what you’re really like: and give you a chance.

Lastly, I’d do this: take a stock-check of all the things you’re doing RIGHT. Take an objective look at the value you’re creating in your organization. Identify the good things. We don’t always do this enough!

Ulkauma – I am not sure if this will work for you, but I suggest you join my mailing list and connect personally if you need to discuss this further.

And I have lots and lots of groups, that feature is my favorite.

Example: if we were just told to stack some bricks on top of each other in the sweltering heat, perhaps our motivation and performance wouldn’t be good. But if we were told that we’re building a hospital, then our motivation and performance would be different…

* Socialize as much as you can what you’re doing and your successes. Tell people what you have been asked to do (without sharing the difficult circumstances in which you were asked). The more truthful information there is out there, the less room there is for untruths.
* Don’t underestimate how perceptive people can be – sly people often give themselves away in their body-language and their eyes. Probably, people beyond your circle of friends know what your boss is like. It’s the inconsistencies of bahavior that people sense. Don’t feel that you’re totally alone, even if you can’t/won’t talk about her to other people.
* Any disciplinary or corrective action applied by the ‘organization’ (i.e. the channels your boss would have to go through) will be under a control regime. I doubt your boss would want that as it will mean she has to maintain a more complex web of lies to back her ‘official’ record up, so I doubt it will go that far. That is, unless you instigate it.
* From this point forward, maintain a log of everything you can provide evidence for. Get everything in writing if possible, i.e. your vacation requests and approvals. Communicate these to stakeholders beyond your boss if you believe it is relevant to them.
* I think an all-out assault on your boss could lead to a war that you may or may not win – or come out of unscathed. Discussing your bosses slacking behavior could be interpreted as ‘opinion’ rather than truth.
* As far as attitude goes: be solid in the knowledge that you are a good worker who operates with integrity. Feel strength in your conviction to do a good job off your own back. Don’t give in. Grit your teeth.
* If all else fails, use the system. Get HR involved, and if you are put on some form of ‘performance management’ track then shine through and show that you’re made of tougher stuff.
* Remember, just because she is your boss, it doesn’t give her the right to bully you. You have every right to assert yourself to her. If you can do it, speak openly and factually with her, and avoid accusations you can’t back up (as she will jump on those and you will then be on the back foot).

I wish I could be more help Gabi. I hope you can muster the strength to get through Tuesday and come out on top.

Simon

I work for a University…with educated people who are mostly passionate about their jobs. However, my boss is a total slacker and definitely not a manager…but of course, that is none of my business…until she starts complaining about me for not helping her seem like she is doing work to her own bosses…so when we have a meeting or have to prepare reports or presentations – she quickly e-mails me and asks me to prepare something that she can review -that is her way of contributing to the piece – and then she sends it off, from her e-mail to the PIs…how unfair is that? One time, I asked a coworker to forward me an e-mail my boss send out to her boss after a long team meeting to which I contributed immensely and which I was not copied on…to find out that each paragraph started with “I” – she has given no credit to myself or the rest of the team. Since her bosses are in and out – maybe see her 2 hours a week in our team meeting, they have no clue how big of a slacker she is…so, when did this become relevant to me? I have confronted her about not including my name or the team in the e-mail saying that we should mention to her bosses that it was miscommunicated who contributed. One of my coworkers did, her bosses understood and wanted to move on with the meeting – however, my boss decides to stand up in the meeting, point at me and yell at me in front of everybody that I make accusations that are unfair and that she never meant it to sound a unfair. Her boss (my boss’s boss) quickly stepped in while I was being very quiet…and said to stop the non-sense because they understood that was team work. However, since that day my boss is been looking for every occasion to make me look bad. She forgets to add me in e-mails…smiles to my face and tells me I am greatly appreciated and needed…then goes behind my back to others at the work place (who are thank god my friends and she does not know that)…and tells them she is not sure about what my responsibilities are…and that I do not have much initiative…pretty much a lot of lies…but, she did mention something to her bosses in completely the wrong context that is affecting my current position. I have informed her of taking two weeks vacation in August and marked on the calendar in her office. She has given me the ok – especially coz she is taking a vacation in the same time…however, tonight I just got an e-mail from one of her bosses- the biggest boss on our project – saying that they were surprised to find out I am leaving at such an important time and that they were informed that I did not ask for permission at all – and that I should have asked them anyways, in addition to her – so she threw me under the bus…now they are questioning if they should pay me for my time since they need me here…and are questioning whether this will be my job in the fall…
She actually left already and her bosses want to meet me and discuss what I have been doing in the past two months and also talk about the traveling I will do in August.
I do not want to start talking bad about her to them because it will just be ugly and I don’t like to do that…but she is unfair! Plus, she should have communicated to them what each person is doing etc…but she seems to act confused when she has to explain to them about my work load…so at this point I am confused on what to do…friends from work who know the situation have advised me to speak up…write someone about my contributions and do talk about her slacker behavior – but I don’t think I can do that…what is your advice?
When I meet with them – what should my attitude be? You suggest above to avoid to be defensive and not too emotional…I will try…but I feel that is so unfair she takes credit for my work and that kinds implies I may be slacking…not sure how to deal with this one if not with emotion…

Also, I felt so bad to bring up a personal family issue that i have to deal with on my vacation – which is more of a family retreat that will deal with mourning of my mom and gradnma…hate it that I had to share that with people that barely know me!!! I do not want them to start feeling sorry for me or to think this is an excuse for slacking…which I am not…so, I did though, write them an e-mail with all the parts of the project that I have been working on in the past two months…and the explanation for my necessary vacation…

I am waiting for their response and for the meeting with them on Tuesday…

Please give me your opinions…

Thank you!!!

Active responsibility for creating our own future, I believe, generally comes with gaining wisdom. But if organizations were to be more upfront about the importance of it (and the longer term consequences of it) then junior managers could begin to build on their security as a platform earlier on

I love that last two paragraphs. Just Outstanding. The lack of personal responsibility in one of the hallmarks of junior level management. It is sad how many people do not get that their career and future are in their own hands at all times.

Mike

Asif