Comments on: As A Leader, Your Personality Is Everything (Part Four) http://www.simonstapleton.com/wordpress/2008/11/17/as-a-leader-your-personality-is-everything-part-four/?&owa_medium=feed&owa_sid= I Help You Become a Higher Performer, Get Promoted, and Better Paid Sat, 28 Jan 2012 01:37:34 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: simonstapleton http://www.simonstapleton.com/wordpress/2008/11/17/as-a-leader-your-personality-is-everything-part-four/comment-page-1/#comment-604 simonstapleton Sat, 22 Nov 2008 21:48:50 +0000 http://www.SimonStapleton.com/wordpress/?p=1079#comment-604 Nice article Mark. I've just left a comment on your site - in summary I say: It takes practice to not feel awkward doing this. Nice article Mark. I’ve just left a comment on your site – in summary I say: It takes practice to not feel awkward doing this.

]]> By: Mark McClure Coaching http://www.simonstapleton.com/wordpress/2008/11/17/as-a-leader-your-personality-is-everything-part-four/comment-page-1/#comment-590 Mark McClure Coaching Thu, 20 Nov 2008 03:41:17 +0000 http://www.SimonStapleton.com/wordpress/?p=1079#comment-590 re receiving feedback #4: "Repeat in your own words what the feedback tells you" Two tips I've seen work well: 1- Use these opening words when replying to feedback: "If I've understood you correctly then..." This allows you to focus on the message rather than the message and allows clarification from the feedback provider to come more naturally and openly. (your words leave open that you may have misinterpreted the other person, and that usually leaves room for compromise and understanding). 2- Practice the "Echo Chamber" technique described here in my post. http://markmccluretoday.com/the-5-minute-career-mentor-listening That's very effective for taking you closer to the speaker's body language and emotional tones - as well as of course the words! I would recommend that you practice this technique on a friend (a significant other or family friend is usually a safe bet) then ask them did they notice anything different about how you were listening to them. One thing I notice when I do this drill is that my ego chatter subsides as I connect more completely with the other person's message and delivery. (This is a great skill for coaches/mentors/leaders because we cannot perform effectively when 'fencing' around the other's parlance and parley! (not sure if that makes sense but that's how it came out haha!) re receiving feedback #4:
“Repeat in your own words what the feedback tells you”

Two tips I’ve seen work well:

1- Use these opening words when replying to feedback:
“If I’ve understood you correctly then…”

This allows you to focus on the message rather than the message and allows clarification from the feedback provider to come more naturally and openly. (your words leave open that you may have misinterpreted the other person, and that usually leaves room for compromise and understanding).

2- Practice the “Echo Chamber” technique described here in my post.
http://markmccluretoday.com/the-5-minute-career-mentor-listening

That’s very effective for taking you closer to the speaker’s body language and emotional tones – as well as of course the words!

I would recommend that you practice this technique on a friend (a significant other or family friend is usually a safe bet) then ask them did they notice anything different about how you were listening to them.

One thing I notice when I do this drill is that my ego chatter subsides as I connect more completely with the other person’s message and delivery. (This is a great skill for coaches/mentors/leaders because we cannot perform effectively when ‘fencing’ around the other’s parlance and parley! (not sure if that makes sense but that’s how it came out haha!)

]]>